You know how many words I’ve written for my Camp story so far? Zero.
I don’t even really feel bad about it, I just feel resigned about it all. I could name a lot of reasons why I just can’t seem to write, starting with the fact that I feel out of practice. I haven’t written anything since last November, although I guess that all my tweets since then could amount to a few hundred or thousand words. But I’ve realized that writing isn’t like riding a bike; it’s not possible to stop doing it for a long time, but easily pick it up again. I guess I’ve gotten so used to not writing, that I don’t know how to start again. Work has also chosen this month to be particularly annoying and overwhelming, and I can never work up enough energy to try and put the story into words.
The biggest reason, though, is that I think I bit off more than I can chew. I don’t know about you, but I can’t just jump straight back into writing after a hiatus of over four months, and I guess that’s particularly true for starting a new story. Granted, I’ve had it outlined for a while, but while I did start prepping for Camp in March, I didn’t do it enough. It also didn’t help that Devan decided he didn’t want to be a nice guy, meaning the original plot didn’t work anymore and I had to adjust it to reflect the change in him. My brain decided that this was too much, too complicated, too difficult, so here I am, almost a week into April, with nothing written.
I did consider stepping down, but honestly, that’s just giving up and I didn’t want to be a quitter. I do want to challenge myself again and use Camp as a stepping stone to start a writing routine. That means I can’t quit, so what I’ll be doing is work on my NaNoWriMo 2015 story instead. It’s not ideal and maybe not much of a challenge, but I figure I should start small. That’s better than not starting at all, right? I’ve got about 20% of the story left to write, plus a couple of scenes I skipped in the middle. My total word count was a bit short of 30.000 words, so I think I’ll attempt to hit 45K or finish, whichever comes first.
I hope your writing is going better than mine, and if you’re participating in Camp as well, good luck! To all the other writers: happy writing! 🙂